Chariot of Fire -2.7 - Who Has the Hearts of Your Children? - Part 3

What is Sealing Your Children?

What do I mean by sealing your children? To seal your child is to establish his/her identity as your child. In the Equipping Men Series: Practical Tools for Life's Issues, I explain four principles of identity. I'll give a brief overview of them below. (You might listen to the first tape of that series, It's a Matter of Identity, as a review. Or if you are interested in purchasing the series you may do so at www.spiritofelijah.com).

1. Identity has to do with to whom you belong. Everyone treasures a relationship offering a hope of happiness and significance. We want a relationship that has meaning. Therefore, as parents, you must give meaning to their being your children.
2. Identity has to do with power. I don't mean physical power, but spiritual power. Whoever we want to belong to or identity with becomes a source of power to gain happiness or significance in life.
3. Identity has to do with who shapes your life. Whoever will give us meaning and hope, we will give them the power to shape our lives. It's amazing what a young man will do when he wants to identify with a young lady. He may change the way he dresses, the music to which he listens, and his personal hygiene.
4. Identity has to do with what your father did or didn't do. God has ordained that the father direct the identity course of his son or daughter either actively, by what he does do, or passively, by what he doesn't do. If the father doesn't seal his children by giving them hope, then they will seek it elsewhere.
Sealing Your Children is Important!

If we need sealing as sons and daughters of God, then our sons and daughters need sealing as our children. The apostle Paul wrote to the Ephesians and the Corinthians that they were sealed in Christ. We notice that the sealing occurred at the point when our relationship to God through Jesus Christ was established.

In Him, you also, after listening to the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation -- having also believed, you were sealed in Him with the Holy Spirit of promise, who is given as a pledge of our inheritance, with a view to the redemption of God's own possession, to the praise of His glory (Ephesians 1:13-14).

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption (Ephesians 4:30).

...Who also sealed us and gave us the Spirit in our hearts as a pledge (2 Corinthians 1:22).

You notice that the Holy Spirit, who was given as a pledge of our inheritance, accomplished the sealing. When we have such a hope of future blessing and happiness, it fills us! That's why it is important to seal your children: it fills them.

The importance of sealing your children may be illustrated with a bottle that has been sealed by a cap. The cap's purpose is two-fold:

* It protects the contents from contamination.

* It keeps what is contained in the bottle from being lost.

In the same way, when a father seals his children by giving their relationship meaning and by having a vision for their future blessing, it fills them. When something is full, there's no room for anything else. Thus, the children don't feel the inner compulsion to find someone else with whom to identify. As a result, what you teach them and instill in them at an early age isn't lost or contaminated by the world's philosophies and allurements. From a spiritual and biblical perspective, a son is filled with the spirit of sonship to his father by the sealing process. In Galatians 4:6 we see Paul'sunderstanding of this dynamic that occurs in our hearts when God gives us the Holy Spirit. He wrote, "And because you are sons, God has sent forth the Spirit of His Son into our hearts, crying, "Abba! Father!" You notice that the Holy Spirit, who seals us, keeps our hearts turned to God, our Father. In the same way, when a father seals his children, the spirit of the father is placed within the children. When the spirit of the father fills his children, their hearts turn to their father.

Sealing Your Children is a Constant Process

Maintaining the direction of the heart of your children takes diligence. The ministry of the Spirit of Elijah (Malachi 4:6) pertains to the hearts of fathers and children. We must be diligent to keep our hearts turned toward our children being careful not to let work, accomplishing daily agendas, recreation, or other things capture our hearts' focus. At the same time, we should help our children keep their hearts turned toward us. As we fill their lives with activities that provide hope for their future, meaningful relationships, and sound biblical teaching with application to life, the sealing process is maintained.

Your Relationship With Your Children Should Have Meaning and Purpose.

When you show your children you love them and your heart is turned to them, you are affirming their importance to you. Their value to you is manifested in many ways:

* By the way you respond to their failures and the inconvenience they pose to your life.
* By the fact that you will confront their immaturities in a loving, patient way through discipline and training.
* By communicating to them in their love language (words, touch, gifts, acts of service, or quality time).
* By showing your relationship with them is more important than other things and people.
* By teaching them their relationship with you is a calling from God (listen to "Rising to the Call" and "Rising to the Call of Holiness" from The Rising to the Call Series).
Can you think of some other ways to show their value? Perhaps this might be a good topic for family discussion. You might ask them: What do we do to show that you are of value to us? What can we do to show that you are of value to us? What do we do that other parents don't do with their children that makes you special? Maybe you can think of some other questions.

Develop Vision for Preparing Them for Life

You also seal your child by giving a vision that prepares them for life and provides the greatest hope for the future. You might think about things you wish you had known before you were married and had children. Then consider how to teach them to your children and give them practice applying those skills. For instance, your daughters will need to know good nutrition, how to plan a menu, how to get the best buy and value, how to cook those meals, and then clean up. When you think it is time for them to prepare and practice those skills, show them the hope of learning them andpracticing them. Turn some of those responsibilities over to them for a month or so in order for them to become comfortable and confident in doing them. Your sons will be blessed if they know how to study the Bible and lead a family devotion time. When a son is old enough to do so, teach him how to interpret Scripture, to use Bible study helps, and organize his findings to share with the family. As you give him opportunities to lead the family devotion times, he is being trained for life. The important thing is to use hope to motivate him. Show him how his doing this will be a blessing to him and his family. I found it helpful to develop vision for each child over a six-month period. Alma and I would take a three-day weekend "get away" where we would talk, evaluate, and plan the next six months. We discussed where the children were in regard to their character development, physical condition, relationships, academic program, practical life skills, and spiritual development. Then we developed a plan in each of these areas for each child. We didn't overload them, but worked on at least two things in each area of growth.

Show Your Children the Hope of Your Vision

When we came home, we sat down with each one and discussed how the plan would prepare them for life and outlined for them the blessings to come. Sometimes changes were made as we listened to each child's responses and input. The idea is to share with them what you plan to do and then the promises which come with it so hope can be experienced. (The importance of giving vision may be understood by listening to the tape "Leading With Vision" from The Equipping Men Series). You might also show how children/teens who are not being prepared for life are going to suffer the consequences. They may have temporal fun, but it is foolish and shortsighted compared to the pain and suffering which may be experienced in the future because they wasted the preparation years by playing and partying.

Why is this important? A child who is sealed is protected by the faith. Remember the dynamics of hope? Promises produce hope, hope produces faith, and faith moves them to action and protects them. We see these dynamics described in 1 Peter 1: 3-5.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.

Not only will you want to lay the vision before them, but also it is wise to show them how you are going to make it fun. Since children treasure fun above most anything, it would be wise to consider how to make what you do, fun. This requires some creativity, and the Lord can provide what you need.

Giving our Children Hope Seals Their Hearts.

I hope you've seen the value of sealing your children's hearts and how instilling hope accomplishes that important process. We'll talk more about this next month as we conclude this series of articles on the power of hope in discipling our children. Until then, remember who has the hearts of your children: Whoever gives them the most hope! Until then, remember: Whoever gives your children the most hope is the person who has their hearts.

Norm Wakefield
Elijah Ministries
PO 377
Bulverde, Texas 78163
www.spiritofelijah.com